Why am I Not Happy? 17 Reasons and Their Respective Remedies.

Happiness is no secret.

Certain factors boost it while others reduce it.

Most of these factors are under our control. Better yet, we can change many of them quickly and easily.

In this article, we’ll look at 17 factors that may reduce your happiness. And we’ll discuss what you can do to correct hem.

If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Why am I not happy?” this article will give you the answers.

1. You’re Lazy

As explained in my previous article, happiness takes effort.

Most activities known to boost happiness – e.g., exercising regularly, meditatingspending time in nature, finding a fulfilling job, experiencing flow, or planning a vacation – can be time-consuming and hard.

Sitting on the couch all day long, playing video games, or eating junk food won’t make us happy. Neither will sucking it up at a job we don’t like. Neither will spending leisure time watching hours and hours of...

Continue Reading...

Just Breathe...

Maybe you have come across breathing through yoga or pilates, but if like me until a few years ago,  you think of it as one of 'those alternative' type things and are a little sceptical, here is an article to change your mind. 

When I was a child I was asthmatic. It wasn't diagnosed until I was 16 and living in smog-filled Tokyo, but it most likely had been there all along. I  had been one of those kids who always had a winter cough that sounded like a dog barking and always seemed to struggle running or doing anything physical that lasted for more than a few minutes. When we moved to Tokyo my breathing noticeably became worse until one day on holiday in Australia after trying to get a medical certificate to go on a Padi diving course a local Doctor gave me a baffled look and said "hasn't anyone told you you are asthmatic." From then on for the next 10 years I would have noticeable bouts of feeling like someone was sitting on my chest. People would...

Continue Reading...

How to Break Bad Habits

A habit is a “superhighway” neural path that your brain has built to hand over control of repetitive tasks to your body so that it doesn’t have to, freeing your conscious mind up for other things.

Numerous cognitive neuroscientists have conducted studies that have revealed that only 5% of our cognitive activities (decisions, emotions, actions, behaviour) are conscious whereas the remaining 95% is generated in a non-conscious / subconscious manner.  (what's the difference between subconscious and un/non-conscious I hear you ask.... spelling!)

The conscious mind can think freely and create new ideas ‘out of the box’. The subconscious mind, which is basically a supercomputer loaded with a database of programmed behaviours, most of which we acquired before we reached the age of six.

The subconscious mind cannot move outside of its fixed programs – it automatically reacts to situations using stored behaviour responses. It...

Continue Reading...

Mind the Gap

You have more control than you think you do...

You wake up late, it's raining, it's dark and you've got a meeting today that you really don't want to go to. You visibly slump, you frown and drag yourself out of bed with the weight of the world holding you down.

At breakfast when you ask your son to hurry up, he seemingly ignores you, and then gives you that 'look' the one that screams contempt, that lacks the respect you feel you are owed... and your blood boils.

Both of these examples could be seen as "cause and effect" however in the principles of psychology they are actually "stimulus and response."

Something happens to you..... and then you react to it.

What if there was another way?

What many of us don't realise is that there is a "Gap" between the stimulus and the response where we are choosing how to react. You might previously have felt that this was a subconscious process, a space to infinitesimal for a conscious decision, right?

So who is responsible for the action or...

Continue Reading...

Are you standing in your own way?

Achieving goals is not always easy even if you make them S.M.A.R.T Goals (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic & time bound) or even D.U.M.B. Goals (dream driven, uplifting, methodical/manageable, and beneficial behaviour based).

The Question is: Are you standing in your own way?

Are you hoping for success, or expecting success?

Here are 10 ways you can turn your goals around so that you can break through to success.

1. Passion for the Outcome and the Process!

Goals are about moving towards a future vision that you can be proud of, that you are passionate about. Without that yearning, that sense of desire, that attachment to the process as well as the outcome it is hard to demand more of ourselves.

Often we inadvertently take on the Goals of another person, be these suggestions from a well-meaning friend or family member or health practitioner. Or perhaps we have just looked at someone else and decided that we want what we view to be "their life."

As a way of getting...

Continue Reading...

What is Procrastination, and How do I stop procrastinating?

Procrastination - "the action of delaying or postponing something"
 
Or as the ancient Greeks called it Akrasia. As far back as Aristotle and Socrates humans have recorded observing the conundrum of 'why people do things against their better judgement'. Why do we put things off and lack in self-control?
 
Why do we do procrastinate?
 
Behavioural Psychologists put it down to rewards and time.
If you can have a small reward NOW, then that can be a  more powerful motivator than a large reward later. This is known as Time Inconsistency.
 
Our Future self is very good at setting goals, but it is our Present self that takes action, and our present self is motivated by what happens now.
 
If you stay on the couch, where it is nice and comfy, that, can be perceived as being a greater reward than the future possibility of, being fitter and healthier, should you decide to get up and go for a run.
 
The Present self is all about instant gratification.
...
Continue Reading...

The Power of Habits

Want to know a secret?

Want to be able to be happy all the time?

Want to be able to progress at work?

Want to get fitter, healthier, lose weight?

Here's the secret:

Habits

We might think habits are boring, but here is what happened to me.

I was listening to the audio book Atomic Habits by James Clear, and you know how sometimes it takes a few times of someone saying the same thing several times in several ways.....Well, this time I finally got it. James explained how habits transformed his life, and now they have mine.

Habits are everything, they are who we are, they are what we do. They are automatic. They are painless. We don't even realise that we are doing them. They are subconscious. 

Habits are easy, because, well, they are a habit!

Put simply when you 

  1. Create a new Habit
  2. Put the new habit on autopilot

Or

  1. Break a bad habit
  2. Swap it for something that serves you

Then you can use your habits to build your new life automatically. 

Pretty simple...

Continue Reading...

Are you using your time the best way ?

Do you know the 4 Zones of your Activities ?

“If you are human, you have a calling: to live your genius.” – Gay Hendricks

Have you ever examined how you spend most of your working hours?

What kind of activities consume your entire day and what should be the ideal activities that you know you need to incorporate in your day?

How can you feel fulfilled at the end of the day?

If above few questions resonated with you, then keep reading, as this article is all about how you can safeguard your time from being wasted on low-priority activities and how to find your most important activities that will lead you towards the path of fulfilment.

We will talk about four different zones of activities, in which all of your activities can be categorized, as formulated by Gay Hendricks in his book The Big Leap: Conquer Your Hidden Fear And Take Life To The Next Level

Here are the four different zones of...

Continue Reading...

5 Tips to Write and Use Affirmations

What do you know about limiting beliefs and how to radically change your mindset about them? Have you heard the term, “self-fulfilled prophecy?” That is our limiting beliefs! If we truly believe that we cannot do something, then we WILL NOT be able to.

So if you continually tell yourself that you will never lose the weight, find the right relationship, get the promotion, or follow your dream, then it is time for you to start demolishing those limiting beliefs in your head.

One way to do this is through rewriting your self-talk through affirmations and mantras. Keep reading to see 5 easy steps to write and use affirmations in your life. At the end, there will be a FREE gift to help you on your path to Create A Life You Love.

Step 1:

What we think about and focus on becomes our reality, so your affirmations must be stated positively in order to manifest a positive outcome. If your go-to thoughts are negative, try this exercise:

  1. Fold a blank piece of paper in half
  2. ...
Continue Reading...

How 60 minutes on a Sunday can change your Life!

Monday morning comes around —and there are typically two types of people out there:

95% of people wake up in a fog, scattered, and putting out fires. They have no clarity on where they’re going —they simply want to make it through the day as fast as they can, so they can come back, “relax” and/or lay on the couch, binge-watching Netflix.

(Not that there’s anything inherently wrong with Netflix…but distraction is usually a feedback mechanism for a lack of clarity and purpose.)

Then, there’s the 5% of people who wake up with intention —they’ve designed their day based on a broader desire or vision. Their actions, rituals, habits, and environments support where they’re headed. There’s a peace and calm, balanced with a deliberate focus to start their week.

Now, there’s no question who is more likely to create meaningful progress in their life and business between these two. But if you’re...

Continue Reading...
1 2
Close

Join our Free Newsletter

Join me and 15,000+ fellow high performers on our journey to becoming the best versions of ourselves.

How to become more productive, build self-discipline, gain greater confidence, get boundless energy, and just generally live with more calm, enthusiasm, and happiness.

Just enter your name and email address below and click "COUNT ME IN!" to join us: